I thought things were just fine the way it is. But I guess not. Things are suddenly falling apart. My world is turning upside and down. I was fooled by the lies and deprived to know the truth. I forgot not to trust everyone around me. That I should be tact. Well, I'll remind my self that every now and then.
I thought years of friendship will be enough. Well, obviously not. That fact was a slap to my face. Everything that had happened to me for the past few months is all bullshits. I do stupid things that I willingly did which makes it more stupid. I loathed people which is special to me. I find myself going back to my bad habits. My body is not functioning properly. I don't know what to do! I have no direction in life as of now. What more could I ask for to make my life miserable?
I'm so hopeless and helpless. Retreat could be a great help. I want a peace of mind. I want to sort things out and make solutions to avoid more pain. Darn! Everything seems so MISPLACED. This is not supposed to be happening. We should all be happy to live our life now. We should not be tired of the monotonous way of living our life. We should be cherishing every moment of everything because we all know that end is near.
Damn it! Everything and everybody kept on hurting everything and everybody. Are we supposed to live this way? Is this the sign of evil overpowering goodness? People kept on doing bad things now. They are not afraid of the consequences. What a stupid thing for people to follow the way the world lives!
I love you guys. I love you. And I love myself. But now, love isn't enough. We should just talk it out! Then at that time we could decide, I think.
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